It’s hard to pee with so many around.

You know I don’t like going poop in a crowd …

(GnR will never be the same now lol)

I think I get a gold star patience award for having a 20 min discussion about why it isn’t cool to poop your pants and then hang out in it. It’s not cool to be stinky. It’s not good for your butt. Do you want to have an ouchy bottom? And so on.

Why is this even a thing? While I’m doing it there’s a little voice in the back of my head going WTF kid why don’t you want this diaper changed ASAP? Why does a tiny human need to be cojoled out of his poopy drawers? I finally broke down and bribed him with M&Ms. A cooperative diaper change is a much happier experience for us all.

I’ve heard it’s more of a boy thing. My mom doesn’t have any stories like this about me. In fact, in her stories I pop out already talking, potty trained and refuse to even bother with diapers. Have I mentioned I’m over 40 and my mom’s had a lot of time to forget? I suspect there’s some holes in her story.

I also suspect there are a lot of future conversations with the toddler where I’m going to find myself going WTF am I talking about. I can only imagine what lies in store for me in the future…

“Why you can’t jump off the roof into the pool and other tragedies waiting to happen”

“The reason you have to wear clothes, and yes that includes pants”

“Ice cream is not suitable for dinner even though dad thinks it is”

What conversations have you had that go on the ridiculous list?

Sometimes, my patience pays off. He may be reading the book upside down, but at least he’s trying and “going potty like daddy” 🙂