Becoming a mom has taught me many things, and one lesson that comes up again and again is to not be judgmental of things I know nothing about. And one thing I knew very little about pre-baby, was raising children, particularly little boys. Nature tends to overcome the nurture with those little hellions. (said in the most lovingly way possible)

I say this because I tend to be a pretty gentle person. I don’t walk around hitting things and looking for things to tear up. But you know who does? Little boys.

Even little boys that were raised not to tear up mom’s plants, to respect nature, and not to hurt things or other people’s property. It’s like there’s something ingrained deep inside their brains going “Deeeeeestroyyyyy!!!”

They’re Born That Way

When I take a walk with my son and spend the whole time trying to not get whacked in the face with a stick, I can’t help but remember back when my husband and I took his young nephew on a hike.

On the way to the trail, he started kicking up dirt and covering his shoes. We were like, stop that, why would you do that?? Then about 30 seconds in, he grabbed a stick and just started whacking all the trees and everything in his path.

When we told him to put down his stick, he picked up rocks and started throwing them at the trees. There was no relaxing hiking, it was all, “Stop that, put that down, quit it, no you can’t pee there.”

My husband and I judgmentally grumbled about how unruly he was, how his parents needed to teach him how to behave, and how one day when we had kids, they wouldn’t be doing stuff like that.

And fate went bwhahahahahaha

A Less Judgmental Life

My mind always goes back to that story whenever I’m trying to reign in my son’s destructive tendencies. Whether it’s smearing himself in dirt, or asking to smash something, demolition and mayhem seem to be the root of his joy.

So now when I see other kids, girls or boys, acting unruly, I don’t judge them or their parents. It doesn’t matter how much you tell them not to do it, they’re still going to try and do it.

Now, that doesn’t mean I think it should be totally ignored. I do think you still have to try and sway them from their path of destruction. Left unchecked, it often escalates into actual property or personal damage. Sometimes both.

But you can’t avoid 100% of the casualties resulting from their natural instinct to see what happens when they smash stuff. No matter how good of a parent you try to be, your sweet kid is going to do something totally ridiculous when you look away for two minutes.

And I’m not going to judge you for it one bit.